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And The Castle Has Been SO Safe Lately…

by DanStanding on September 6, 2012 at 6:10 am
Posted In: 19 - To The Wild North
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Discussion ¬

  1. MNH
    September 6, 2012, 7:00 am | # | Reply

    Hey look it is a Street Shark villain. Oh and first.

  2. Dullahan
    September 6, 2012, 7:37 am | # | Reply

    And here I thought “Beware of sharks” was only needed on beaches.

  3. crypticmirror
    September 6, 2012, 7:58 am | # | Reply

    Bulettes!! I remember them fondly, will there be Owl Bears too? Oooh, with all that armour protecting their modesty, this party could be in real trouble if a Rust Monster is rolled up.

  4. PShark
    September 6, 2012, 8:11 am | # | Reply

    Candygram.

  5. germanvisitor
    September 6, 2012, 8:36 am | # | Reply

    Sharktopussy?!

  6. deanatay
    September 6, 2012, 9:05 am | # | Reply

    That’s a _land_ sharktoppussy.

  7. deanatay
    September 6, 2012, 9:16 am | # | Reply

    BTW, not really a bulette, as bulettes have thick, stumpy legs. This seems to have tentacles. These are clearly land sharktopusses.

  8. kwah
    September 6, 2012, 11:11 am | # | Reply

    how do you out do a land sharkopuss in the danger scale !

  9. crypticmirror
    September 6, 2012, 12:40 pm | # | Reply

    @deanatay, you’re right. Exiern is more Gamma World than DnD. Hey, Exiern is Earth “After the End”…it all makes sense (when you are as drunk as I am right now).

  10. dragondeathlord
    September 6, 2012, 12:47 pm | # | Reply

    I have eaten great white,,,Now I am so hungry!

  11. Wolf
    September 6, 2012, 1:18 pm | # | Reply

    Is no one else noticing the cloud formations in the first panel?

  12. TheOneAndLonely
    September 6, 2012, 2:16 pm | # | Reply

    Judging by the lack of reaction to both the fin in the road and presumably loud border post destruction, landsharktopuses are relatively weak in a fight, with a taste for buildings rather than horses.
    Alternatively, the above applies to normal landsharks.
    The specimen seen today is the very rare and dangerous landsharktopuss, which also has a taste for buildings. After easily disposing of the two guards, it will proceed to attack all other borderposts (which seem to be rather unfortified and undermanned for the border to a culture known to be rather raid-y).
    This loss of contact with the northern border will be blamed on barbarians, causing the King to order a retaliatory strike. When this occurs, the barbarians will be rather suspicious of the recently arrived and heavily armed southerners.
    Through some series of events, either Typhan-knee, Denver, or royal-guard-whose-name-I-can’t-remember-at-the-moment will end up fighting the chief of the tribe, win, and get leadership of the tribe.
    This will make them friendly towards the kingdom, while surrounded by newly hostile tribes, who view them as weak since they lost to puny southerners/a bookworm.
    Urtica gains new allies and a foothold in the north, for either a bulwark, or potential expansion.
    Just as planned.

  13. TheOneAndLonely
    September 6, 2012, 2:17 pm | # | Reply

    That last half might have gotten away from me slightly

  14. Insectoid
    September 6, 2012, 3:37 pm | # | Reply

    Land sharks??

  15. Trieo
    September 6, 2012, 3:39 pm | # | Reply

    Land sharks SNL: http://www.spike.com/video-clips/gytf2i/land-shark

  16. David
    September 6, 2012, 4:22 pm | # | Reply

    “which seem to be rather unfortified and undermanned for the border to a culture known to be rather raid-y”

    actually, no I think it makes sense. This is the first line of defense, a small scout post. If it stays up, you are at peace with barbarians, if it is destroyed, you are at war, and each side raids the other across the no-mans land.

  17. RAIV
    September 7, 2012, 5:42 am | # | Reply

    It must be hell to watch over that border.

  18. Hornet
    September 7, 2012, 10:12 am | # | Reply

    @RAIV, I’d say think North / South Korean DMZ.

  19. sandman
    September 7, 2012, 12:31 pm | # | Reply

    Cool Land Sharks
    Someones been watching the movie Sharktapuss.

  20. crypticmirror
    September 7, 2012, 12:38 pm | # | Reply

    @ David. Security theatre, it is a universal constant. That outpost might do sod all, but I bet everyone feels better knowing it is there. The guards are the Thin Red(shirt) Line.

  21. Marscaleb
    September 7, 2012, 12:44 pm | # | Reply

    This comic made me laugh out loud. Just that first panel is all we needed with the sign warning of sharks.

  22. Khamya
    September 7, 2012, 1:59 pm | # | Reply

    The land sharktopuss is awesome, and great work by the artist. I so totally have to do this to my DND players.

  23. crypticmirror
    September 7, 2012, 5:21 pm | # | Reply

    @Khamya if you really want to torture your DnD group, make ’em play a 1st or 2nd edition Gamma World campaign. Guaranteed to reduce even the most hardened RPer to tears.

  24. Apollo4x
    September 7, 2012, 10:46 pm | # | Reply

    See now THAT is what Jaws should of looked like.

  25. RAIV
    September 8, 2012, 12:08 am | # | Reply

    @Hornet I mean, being stationed in a land with land sharks that spring from under your feet without warning?? Gimme the DMZ any time! I currently live in Seoul, only a stone throw’s away from the DMZ, and though North Korea sometimes gets cocky the place is usually quiet. And you always have the chance to fire back, while you can’t bite a shark back. 😉

  26. OrlahEhontas
    September 10, 2012, 1:57 am | # | Reply

    @crypticmirror – I’ve actually done that as a DM. The bad-guy was dabbling in cross dimensional sorcery and had brought some stuff over that he shouldn’t have. Had a fighter in that group that picked up one hell of a weapon, but he didn’t have the INT level to understand it and so he threw it away. Poor bugger! 😀

  27. crypticmirror
    September 10, 2012, 2:11 pm | # | Reply

    Heheh, I hope you told him, once it was too late to use it. That look of anguished frustration on their faces is the best part of DM-ing.

  28. jo
    September 10, 2012, 11:35 pm | # | Reply

    not even going to help? Neils?

  29. OrlahEhontas
    September 11, 2012, 6:17 pm | # | Reply

    @crypticmirror – Of course!! The only one better was later when he swigged down a gender-bending potion and failed to Save vs. Poison. I had fun with that run of characters!!! ;-D

  30. pseudoboob
    September 13, 2012, 2:47 am | # | Reply

    I don’t think they’re tenticles, its more like a graboid(not the tongues) where thats how it burrows.

  31. Deof Movestofca
    April 11, 2014, 12:58 pm | # | Reply

    “This is where it gets more dangerous.”

    There, corrected it for her.

  32. Thisguy
    July 22, 2017, 5:12 pm | # | Reply

    Falling coconuts are considered more dangerous than LandSharks

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